Well this weekend was amazing. I will get into what all of that is about tomorrow. Tonight my path took me someplace else and didn’t allow for the time I would have liked here. However, I am all in with God.
I am following His lead in life. I am not worrying about what others thing about my choices, because I am following His lead for me. To think about how much I have missed out on because of my fear of what others would think! If I am on His path and following the lead He has for me I can’t go wrong!
Do you worry about what others will think of you with things you do? Or are you one of the lucky ones who is a free spirit and hasn’t had a thought or care about what others think of you? I am thankful that my eyes have been opening more and more about what I need to push aside in my life. It isn’t always easy though.
I have joined a book study on Monday nights this summer. I have often felt like I am a triangle trying to fit into a rectangle hole. Maybe it is worse than that! These woman though, they make me feel okay about who I am. I am not big on opening up to people who don’t know me. Let’s be honest I am not big on opening up to people who know me.
There are very few who know what my life is like behind closed doors. Most don’t know about the struggles with mental health. Most don’t know about the struggles with children with mental health issues. Most don’t know about the struggles financially we have dealt with. Most don’t know the phone calls in the middle of the night that take me to the hospital or other less than desirable places. Most don’t know about what goes on in my life.
Yet the very first night, I opened up about something I would not normally do. I am not 100% certain why really, but it was like verbal diarrhea that I could not stop. I don’t think anyone had judged me, or at least no one has indicated they have. If they are, I just don’t want to know. He has been opening up my heart, which in turn has been opening up my mouth. I have been letting people in that I would not normally let in.
I am stepping out of my comfort zone and heading into His zone. It isn’t always easy to fully trust and embrace what He has planned for you. It is so much easier to just trust yourself and your plan. Although if your plan doesn’t line up with His plan I can certainly promise that He will be using your choices as life lessons for you.
Today, in the mail came a card that said, “Your faith isn’t going to make it easy for you, but it will help you make it through.” When I read that I could see me walking hand in hand with Christ. When things were not going well, Him carrying me. Life was never promised to be easy here but I was promised to always have a friend, advisor, healer, comforter, and carrier.
Where are you at in life? Are you following His lead or blazing your own trail? Are you fitting in with others or are you feeling like a misfit? Do you worry about what everyone else may think if you are doing what He asks or are you saying I don’t care, He called me to it?